celebrities

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The Biofuel Boom

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
A couple years ago, investing in biofuels was the sh*t. Oops. It turns out now that we've had a few years to study things, everybody's wrong, and we're all f*cked. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Toke Machine

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

The Professor and Mary Jane

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2008-03-26-maher0325b.jpgNew Rule: If Phil Spector gets to kill people, Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island is allowed to drive with pot in her car. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

The 100 Years War

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
There's a possibility that's starting to scare me: That by a certain neocon definition, Iraq is a success. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Libations of the Cross

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2008-03-14-maher_drunk_religion.jpgNew Rule: Getting drunk is more important than religion. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Spitzer's Trysts: Stop Over-Thinking This

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
I'm going to throw the remote through the TV if one more news twink says something on the order of "When we come back, we'll look into what drives a successful man like Eliot Spitzer to risk it all..." Oh yes, let's convene a panel of experts for that. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Crank Call

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2008-03-04-maher_telecoms_fp.jpgNew Rule: Americans must spend their stimulus checks on crystal meth. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Nader

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
I don't think it matters that Ralph Nader's running. It didn't matter in 2004. How many people even remember he ran in 2004? So it's silly to make a big issue of it. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

New Rule: Ebonic Plague

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2008-02-26-maher_shuster_fpII.jpgNew Rule: Stop punishing people for saying harmless crap as the media did when David Shuster said the Clintons were pimping out Chelsea Clinton. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

My Best Picture

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
My favorite movie of the year was the one about the heartless con man who's obsessed with finding oil. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

George Bush: Pardon All The Turkeys

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
Instead of stuffing a turkey this year, stuff the tradition of turkey for Thanksgiving right where it belongs -- in history's trash can. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

New Rule: Clock Blocker

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2007-11-06-maher_rule_clock_fp.jpgNew Rule: In honor of daylight savings time, Republican candidates must say whether or not they believe the days getting shorter proves that the Earth revolves around the Sun. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

No Crony Left Behind

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
New Rule: In the next fifteen months, President Bush has to perform at least one act that doesn't make money for someone he knows. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

New Rule: Pin Heads

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2007-10-30-maherpinheadnewrulefp.jpgNew Rule: If bowling passes for high school athletics, then maybe it is time for a draft. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Man from GLAAD

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2007-10-26-mahernewruleglaadfp.jpgNew Rule: If you want to convince us you're straight, maybe you should lay off the gladiator references. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Rove Reversal

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
In the 2004 presidential race Karl Rove mobilized Republican voters by getting initiatives banning gay marriage on the ballots in 11 states. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Idiocracy

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
Have too many Americans become gullible, ill-informed idiots who have elevated feelings over facts and replaced critical thinking with a blind sense of trust for authority? Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

New Rule: Stop Saying Iraq is Another Vietnam, it's Another Enron

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
Bush is fighting a war with phony accounting tricks. They fudged the numbers to get us into Iraq, and cooked the books to keep us there. "The surge" is simply another in a long series of inflated stock quotes. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Dear Stabby

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
2007-09-26-maher_OJrule_fp.jpg OJ Simpson must go to Iraq. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

Islamists Still Hate Cartoons

Bill Maher - Thu, 01/12/2017 - 16:30
You don't get to make some Swedish cartoonist follow your backward religious code. That's how we roll here in the West. With freedom of expression. And lots of offensive cartoons. Bill Maher http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/bill-maher
Categories: celebrities

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