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THE FORCE IS STRONG WITH THIS ONE

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 21:05
This Phone Ad Shows You How To Turn Your Penis Into A Lightsaber (Thanks to Ralph) Dave
Categories: celebrities

GET THAT NOBEL PRIZE READY

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 21:02
Netflix has created 'smart' socks that sense when you fall asleep and pause the show you're watching (Thanks to Rick Day) Dave
Categories: celebrities

BUT HE WAS ONLY TRYING TO CHEER UP A FEMALE EMPLOYEE!

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 20:59
Postal worker arrested for delivering mail while naked (Thanks to Colleen Clark) Dave
Categories: celebrities

IN THAT CASE, SIR, YOU ARE FREE TO GO

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 16:50
A 19-year-old Providence man charged with stealing an SUV and ramming it into a police cruiser told police “he just wanted to get out of Rhode Island.” (Thanks to Monique) Dave
Categories: celebrities

IN THAT CASE, SIR, YOU ARE FREE TO GO

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 16:50
A 19-year-old Providence man charged with stealing an SUV and ramming it into a police cruiser told police “he just wanted to get out of Rhode Island.” (Thanks to Monique) Dave
Categories: celebrities

STRIPPER NAME: 'IAN KOGNITO.' REALLY.

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 16:47
British man performed as stripper while claiming thousands of dollars in disability benefits (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson) Dave
Categories: celebrities

SOMEBODY'S NOT GETTING A BONUS THIS YEAR

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 01:07
NY jewelry store's diamonds weren't stolen, workers threw them away (Thanks to Andrew Mendez) Dave
Categories: celebrities

CSI: BALLYMAGROARTY

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 01:03
Man ‘bared his buttocks and rubbed his nipples’ at police (Thanks to Unholy Slacker) Dave
Categories: celebrities

DUH

dave barry - Thu, 12/17/2015 - 01:00
Florida Continued To Be The Worst In 2015 (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson) Dave
Categories: celebrities

WE BLAME GLOBAL CLIMATE CHANGE

dave barry - Wed, 12/16/2015 - 20:49
Zombie Apocalypse A Possibility? Rise in Zombie-Like Infection Should Trigger An International Call of Action, An Expert Reveals (Thanks to Allen at Division) Dave
Categories: celebrities

THAT IS ONE OLD DOG

dave barry - Wed, 12/16/2015 - 20:45
Dog has been man's best friend for 33,000 years, DNA study finds (Thanks to coscolo) Dave
Categories: celebrities

IF THAT HAD BEEN MIAMI, HE'D BE A ROAD SMEAR

dave barry - Wed, 12/16/2015 - 20:43
Houston man charged for proposing to girlfriend on highway, halting traffic in viral video Autoplay. (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson) Dave
Categories: celebrities

Steve H. Hanke: Lunch With Leakey

angelina jolie - Wed, 12/16/2015 - 19:20
All my arithmetic pointed to a massive amount of corruption at the very highest levels of government. When the Chief Game Warden figured out where my collection and analysis of what were considered rather obscure primary data were pointing, I became persona non grata.

Read more: Leakey, Kenya, Richard, Angelina Jolie, Wildlife, Conservation, Savannah, Green News

Categories: celebrities

Get on these, Hollywood

Jet Li Collection - Tue, 12/15/2015 - 14:04

Day Eight – Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, Joyous Saturnalia, and I hate myself for coming up with this idea!

Independence Day:  Resurgence.  X-Men:  Apocalypse.  Captain America:  Civil War.  Even Batman V. Superman:  Overrated Hyped Fight of Justice.  2016 is full of movie sequels.  Some are pretty high on my “want-to” list.  Others I will ignore until Netflix puts them on free streaming.  But it really got me thinking about the movies that truly need a sequel.  Or better yet, a prequel.

So to help Hollywood along for absolutely no money (except what I’d sue them for if any of these ideas come to fruition), and cap off my Hanukkah series, here is a list of sequels and prequels that need to be made.

(Prequel) The Breakfast Club:  Kindergarten Year – Did you know the quirky bunch of misfits who found out they weren’t defined by their stereotypes actually met thirteen years earlier in kindergarten?   Watch as they get drunk on milk and apple juice, play doctor in the hall closet, deal with the tragedy of being hit to hard during tag, and inform their teacher that they don’t understand what an essay is in the first place.

(Sequel) The One II:  The Doubling – Jet Li’s evil character Yulaw escapes from the prison “Hell” universe to discover that he was never really close to being the “One” because there’s an infinite number of parallel universes and it would be impossible to visit them all to kill himself.  Distraught, he has another epic deal with his good self Gabe, who clones himself to gain the upper hand and kill Yulaw once and for all.

(Prequel)  Working Girl II:  What the Term Really Means – Melanie Griffith as a prostitute before becoming a secretary at a finance firm.  C’mon… remember that scene where she tries on the underwear?  Watch it again and tell me I’m wrong about the origins of Tess McGill.

(Sequel) Groundhog Day II:  Arbor Day – After being married for 15 years, Phil and Rita have hit a rough spot.  While at a couple’s therapy retreat to make one last ditch effort to stay together, the day again repeats itself over and over again… only this time they both realize it.  After several hundred cycles of doing whatever they want, they find out they’re off as a triad with their new lover, Leslie.

(Sequel)  Love Actually II – Just make the same movie, but take out the blatantly sexist story line about the husband who gets caught wanting to boink his secretary.  You could also remove most of the story line about the woman hopelessly lusting after the cute graphics guy, but her brother is crazy so she can’t have her own life (yay love!).  Replace them with actual scenes inside the Wisconsin apartment and more hilarious “Rowan Atkinson is a guardian angel saving the day” moments.

(Prequel) Brokeback Mountain II:  Healthy Back Hill – Just release a fake trailer of this so I can watch heads explode.  Then show two hours of cowboys castrating cows.  Wait for Academy Award nominations.

Categories: celebrities

30 Day Song Challenge: Days 21,22,23

jackiechan compiled - Wed, 12/09/2015 - 17:40

Hiya! Hope everyone has been having a fantastic week. Mine has been a tad up and down. Hopefully next week will be better.Anyway onto the songs :)

Day 21: A song you want to dance to at your wedding: ‘Sea of Lovers’  by Christina Perri

So I became absolutely obsessed with this song after my OTP in ‘Jane the Virgin’ kissed during it. It was just such a sweet moment. The song itself is just so romantic. If I ever do get married I reckon it’ll make a really sweet first dance song. Haha but looking at my track record I doubt that’s gonna happen any time soon :P
Day 22: A song that you haven’t listened to in a while: Lots and lots of J-Rock Music (but most notably ‘Blue Planet’ by Alice Nine) 

Oh my gosh when I was in year 8 (so when I was like 13/14 years old) I was obsessed with Jrock! Like I bought the monthly J-Rock magazines that came out, even though it was in Japanese and I couldn’t understand it, just so I could look at the pictures of the bands! Alice Nine was definitely my favourite. I was so in love with Tora (the guy on the guitar).
Day 23: A cover song: ‘I’ll make a Man out of You’ by Jackie Chan

I’m sorry but this is the only cover that will ever matter. I always play this when I have to do something and I’m procrastinating. Helps me get down to business :P

That’s all for now, hope you enjoyed the songs!

Till next time :)

Categories: celebrities, Jackiechan

Former Mouseketeer And 'American Idol' Contestant Found Dead

american idol - Tue, 12/08/2015 - 15:20

(function(){var src_url="https://spshared.5min.com/Scripts/PlayerSeed.js?playList=519315484&height=&width=100&sid=577&origin=undefined&responsive=tru...

Read more: Marque Tate Lynche, Marque Lynche, Mouseketeer, Disney, American Idol, Obituary, Entertainment News

Categories: celebrities

E. Nina Rothe: 'Movies Should Add Value to the Community': A Chat with Dubai Film and TV Commission Chairman Jamal Al Sharif

jackiechan - Mon, 12/07/2015 - 11:48
I caught up with Jamal Al Sharif at last year's Dubai International Film Festival, and as the festival gets ready to kick off its 12th edition in a couple of days, once again in partnership with DFTC and Dubai Studio City, it seemed like the perfect time to celebrate its Chairman, who is also the Managing Director of DSC.

Read more: Star Trek Beyond, Jamal Al Sharif, Dubai Film and TV Commission, Dubai Studio City, Stargate Studios, Dubai International Film Festival, Abu Dhabi, Sex and the City 2, Star Trek, Jackie Chan, United Arab Emirates, Dubai, UAE, Film, Post-Production, Arab World, Gulf Cinema, City of Life, Ali F. Mostafa, The Theory of Everything, Sylvester Stallone, Dftc, Media News

Categories: celebrities, Jackiechan

IT WAS RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING A VALID FLORIDA DRIVER'S LICENSE

dave barry - Thu, 12/03/2015 - 22:18
Donkey takes a ride in Oklahoma police car (Thanks to Bob Brogan and A. Wheeler) Dave
Categories: celebrities

WE'RE ON OUR WAY!

dave barry - Thu, 12/03/2015 - 21:26
Toilet promoters create ‘faecal attraction’ outside Hong Kong shopping centre It involved a "controversial poop character." (Not Mr. Hankey.) (Thanks to Tom Meerschaert) Dave
Categories: celebrities

POLICE ARE LOOKING FOR TIPS

dave barry - Thu, 12/03/2015 - 21:21
Circumcision ambulance stolen in violent carjacking in east London (Thanks to Jan in Grimsby) Dave
Categories: celebrities

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